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Puns
I was going to tell a carpentry joke, but I couldnt find any of that woodwork.
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I was going to tell a carpentry joke, but I couldnt find any of that woodwork.
Puns
I went to a seafood disco last week. I pulled a mussel.
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I went to a seafood disco last week. I pulled a mussel.
Puns
When rabbits get divorced, it’s called splitting hares.
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When rabbits get divorced, it’s called splitting hares.
Puns
Hired someone to do a motivational talk. He came in, stood at the microphone, stared at us, and left. We were left speechless.
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Hired someone to do a motivational talk. He came in, stood at the microphone, stared at us, and left. We were left speechless.
Puns
Overall, I’d say my career as a photographer has been a bit of a blur.
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Overall, I’d say my career as a photographer has been a bit of a blur.
Puns
They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type-O.
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They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type-O.
Puns
I used to have fear of hurdles — but I got over it.
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I used to have fear of hurdles — but I got over it.
Puns
Why didnt the lion win the race? Because he was racing a cheetah.
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Why didnt the lion win the race? Because he was racing a cheetah.
Puns
As a scarecrow, people say Im outstanding in my field. But hay its in my jeans.
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As a scarecrow, people say Im outstanding in my field. But hay its in my jeans.
Puns
Learn to spell – Auto correct isnt always write.
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Learn to spell – Auto correct isnt always write.
Puns
I love telling dad jokes. Sometimes, he even laughs.
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I love telling dad jokes. Sometimes, he even laughs.
Puns
I just nicknamed my new phone Titanic so whenever its charging I can say the Titanic is synching”.
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I just nicknamed my new phone Titanic so whenever its charging I can say the Titanic is synching”.
Puns
I told my son Im named after Thomas Jefferson. He says, But Dad, your name is Brian. I respond, I know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson.
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I told my son Im named after Thomas Jefferson. He says, But Dad, your name is Brian. I respond, I know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson.
Puns
Have you heard about the guy who stole the calendar?! He got 12 months!
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Have you heard about the guy who stole the calendar?! He got 12 months!
Puns
I tried starting a hot air balloon business, but it never took off.
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I tried starting a hot air balloon business, but it never took off.
Puns
What’s blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.
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What’s blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.
Puns
To the guy who invented Zero, thanks for nothing!
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To the guy who invented Zero, thanks for nothing!
Puns
Why should you never breakup with a goalie? Because hes a keeper.
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Why should you never breakup with a goalie? Because hes a keeper.
Puns
I just got kicked out of a secret cooking society. I spilled the beans.
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I just got kicked out of a secret cooking society. I spilled the beans.
Puns
Theres a fine line between a numerator and a denominator (only a fraction of people will get this joke).
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Theres a fine line between a numerator and a denominator (only a fraction of people will get this joke).
Puns
Me: Someone told me you sound like an owl? Friend: Who?
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Me: Someone told me you sound like an owl? Friend: Who?
Puns
The dollar store promised a free abacus with every purchase, but I wouldn’t count on it.
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The dollar store promised a free abacus with every purchase, but I wouldn’t count on it.