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Short Jokes
An elderly couple fell in love. He got down on one knee and said, “I have two questions for you: One, will you marry me?” – “Yes, of course. What’s
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An elderly couple fell in love. He got down on one knee and said, “I have two questions for you: One, will you marry me?” – “Yes, of course. What’s the the other question?” – “Can you help me up?”.
Short Jokes
I bought a book about hair loss and the pages keep falling out.
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I bought a book about hair loss and the pages keep falling out.
Short Jokes
Jeanne: “Mom, I got a hundred in school today!” Mom: “Good job! What did you get a hundred in?” Jeanne: “In two things. I got a forty in math and
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Jeanne: “Mom, I got a hundred in school today!” Mom: “Good job! What did you get a hundred in?” Jeanne: “In two things. I got a forty in math and a sixty in spelling.”
Short Jokes
Judge: “I find you guilty, and I’m giving you a choice: fifteen thousand dollars or six months in jail.” Defendant: “Your Honor, I’ll take the money!”
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Judge: “I find you guilty, and I’m giving you a choice: fifteen thousand dollars or six months in jail.” Defendant: “Your Honor, I’ll take the money!”
Short Jokes
Teacher: “The law of gravity explains why we stay on the ground.” Chloe: “How did we stay on the ground before the law was passed?”
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Teacher: “The law of gravity explains why we stay on the ground.” Chloe: “How did we stay on the ground before the law was passed?”
Short Jokes
Charlie: “Hey, Mom, tomorrow there’s a small PTA meeting.” Mom: “What do you mean by “small?” Charlie: “Well, it’s just you, me, and the principal.”
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Charlie: “Hey, Mom, tomorrow there’s a small PTA meeting.” Mom: “What do you mean by “small?” Charlie: “Well, it’s just you, me, and the principal.”
Short Jokes
Dad: “Today I’ve read we need to buy less Christmas presents and do more fun activities together.” Son: “I’m glad I cannot read.”
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Dad: “Today I’ve read we need to buy less Christmas presents and do more fun activities together.” Son: “I’m glad I cannot read.”
Short Jokes
Got home to find my kids on eBay all day. If they’re still there tomorrow I’ll lower the price.
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Got home to find my kids on eBay all day. If they’re still there tomorrow I’ll lower the price.
Short Jokes
Just before Easter, I remarked to my husband that with the children grown and away from home, this was the first year that we hadn’t dyed eggs and had an
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Just before Easter, I remarked to my husband that with the children grown and away from home, this was the first year that we hadn’t dyed eggs and had an Easter-egg hunt. “That’s all right, honey,” he said. “We can just hide each other’s vitamin pills.”
Short Jokes
I stayed on a ranch last weekend, but couldn’t really sleep well. Every time I’d drift off, a female horse would whinny and wake me back off. It was a
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I stayed on a ranch last weekend, but couldn’t really sleep well. Every time I’d drift off, a female horse would whinny and wake me back off. It was a night-mare.
Short Jokes
My boss said, “This is the third time you’ve been late for work this week. Do you know what that means?” I said, “That it’s only Wednesday.”
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My boss said, “This is the third time you’ve been late for work this week. Do you know what that means?” I said, “That it’s only Wednesday.”
Short Jokes
I wouldn’t say I’m fat, but the batteries in my scales are flat.
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I wouldn’t say I’m fat, but the batteries in my scales are flat.
Short Jokes
My wife says if I don’t stop using reddit, she will smash my head into the keyboard. I think she is just walked through the 3%joki*nc b*Kvfucnjb*#2cnjfbnc.
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My wife says if I don’t stop using reddit, she will smash my head into the keyboard. I think she is just walked through the 3%joki*nc b*Kvfucnjb*#2cnjfbnc.
Short Jokes
Teacher: Clyde, your composition about “My dog” is exactly like your brothers. Did you copy this? Clyde: No sir. It’s the same dog.
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Teacher: Clyde, your composition about “My dog” is exactly like your brothers. Did you copy this? Clyde: No sir. It’s the same dog.
Short Jokes
Did you hear about the dense guy who couldn’t afford personalized license plates for his car? She changed her name to JKM-345
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Did you hear about the dense guy who couldn’t afford personalized license plates for his car? She changed her name to JKM-345
Short Jokes
I think my computer is broken. I clicked the home button and I’m still at work.
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I think my computer is broken. I clicked the home button and I’m still at work.
Short Jokes
While eating Thai food, my daughter asked “Where is Thailand?” I said right between winner-land and loser-land.
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While eating Thai food, my daughter asked “Where is Thailand?” I said right between winner-land and loser-land.
Short Jokes
Why don’t you ever see Santa in a hospital? Because he has private “elf” care!
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Why don’t you ever see Santa in a hospital? Because he has private “elf” care!
Short Jokes
When I get dressed in the morning I ask myself one question…do I mind spilling food on this?
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When I get dressed in the morning I ask myself one question…do I mind spilling food on this?
Short Jokes
A teacher lecturing on population growth — “In India, after every 10 second a women gives birth to a kid.” A boy stands up, and says — “We must find
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A teacher lecturing on population growth — “In India, after every 10 second a women gives birth to a kid.” A boy stands up, and says — “We must find and stop her.”
Short Jokes
The only qualification for working at an airline is making a confused face at a monitor.
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The only qualification for working at an airline is making a confused face at a monitor.
Short Jokes
Anyone who can spell the word drawer backwards will get a reward.
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Anyone who can spell the word drawer backwards will get a reward.
Short Jokes
As a guy came into the office, his boss stormed up and said, “You missed work yesterday, didn’t you?” He replied, “Not particularly.”
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As a guy came into the office, his boss stormed up and said, “You missed work yesterday, didn’t you?” He replied, “Not particularly.”
Short Jokes
A chap goes to the doctor and says “I keep seeing a werewolf, with big sharp teeth”. The doctor says, “have you seen a psychiatrist?” The man says “no, just
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A chap goes to the doctor and says “I keep seeing a werewolf, with big sharp teeth”. The doctor says, “have you seen a psychiatrist?” The man says “no, just a werewolf”.