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Puns
I went to magician’s school but flunked the final exam. They were all trick questions.
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I went to magician’s school but flunked the final exam. They were all trick questions.
Puns
I’m going to take up coin collecting. The change will do me good.
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I’m going to take up coin collecting. The change will do me good.
Puns
My plumber accidently connected my toilet to the hot water heater. Now I keep having hot flushes.
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My plumber accidently connected my toilet to the hot water heater. Now I keep having hot flushes.
Puns
Last night I dreamed I was a vinyl record. I woke up feeling groovy.
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Last night I dreamed I was a vinyl record. I woke up feeling groovy.
Puns
Band Class is the only class where you can blow it.
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Band Class is the only class where you can blow it.
Puns
The other day, I heard that a good friend of mine was outside during a thunderstorm and got struck by lightning. I was a bit shocked, but not as much
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The other day, I heard that a good friend of mine was outside during a thunderstorm and got struck by lightning. I was a bit shocked, but not as much as he was.
Puns
Have you heard about the sauna that serves food? Their specialty is steamed mussels.
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Have you heard about the sauna that serves food? Their specialty is steamed mussels.
Puns
How many college football players does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one but he gets 3 credits for it.
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How many college football players does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one but he gets 3 credits for it.
Puns
I tried for years to snap my thumb and finger together – and suddenly it clicked.
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I tried for years to snap my thumb and finger together – and suddenly it clicked.
Puns
Did you hear that the Hulk has started recycling? He’s really going green.
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Did you hear that the Hulk has started recycling? He’s really going green.
Puns
I once worked as a mannequin in a clothing store. I held that position for a long time.
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I once worked as a mannequin in a clothing store. I held that position for a long time.
Puns
Q: Why did the witch buy a computer? A: She needed the spellcheck.
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Q: Why did the witch buy a computer? A: She needed the spellcheck.
Puns
I’m in a really boring geology class. I dust can’t sand it.
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I’m in a really boring geology class. I dust can’t sand it.
Puns
Did you know the first French fries weren’t actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
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Did you know the first French fries weren’t actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
Puns
I got a reversible jacket for Christmas. I can’t wait to see how it turns out.
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I got a reversible jacket for Christmas. I can’t wait to see how it turns out.
Puns
My brother is an immigration officer. He and I disagree on almost every topic. But he usually sees where I’m coming from.
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My brother is an immigration officer. He and I disagree on almost every topic. But he usually sees where I’m coming from.
Puns
Elevator jokes are funny on so many different levels.
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Elevator jokes are funny on so many different levels.
Puns
Why did the painter hate drawing skies? Because every time he tried, he always blue it.
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Why did the painter hate drawing skies? Because every time he tried, he always blue it.
Puns
Why are great artists so famous? They can always draw a crowd.
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Why are great artists so famous? They can always draw a crowd.
Puns
My geometry tutor told me, “A six-sided polygon is called a hexagon, a five-sided one is called a pentagon.” “What about two sided ones?” I asked. “They don’t exist,” was
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My geometry tutor told me, “A six-sided polygon is called a hexagon, a five-sided one is called a pentagon.” “What about two sided ones?” I asked. “They don’t exist,” was his response. “I beg to differ! I think we should just let bi-gons be bi-gons.
Puns
Once upon a time, there was a fairy called Nuff. Fair enough.
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Once upon a time, there was a fairy called Nuff. Fair enough.
Puns
I’ve been learning Morse code recently. The other day I was talking to someone using Morse code on ham radio and I accidentally said something he found offensive but I
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I’ve been learning Morse code recently. The other day I was talking to someone using Morse code on ham radio and I accidentally said something he found offensive but I couldn’t apologize to him because I haven’t learned remorse code yet.
Puns
What did the kid say when he pranked his parents? Goat-cha.
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What did the kid say when he pranked his parents? Goat-cha.
Puns
There was a Roman emperor who never aged after he turned 19.His name was Constant Teen.
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There was a Roman emperor who never aged after he turned 19.His name was Constant Teen.