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Short Jokes
“What the world needs is more geniuses with humility; there are so few of us left.”
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“What the world needs is more geniuses with humility; there are so few of us left.”
Social Posts
The salesman at the furniture store told me, This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems. I said, Where am I going to find 5 people without any problems?
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The salesman at the furniture store told me, This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems. I said, Where am I going to find 5 people without any problems?
Short Jokes
They say you are what you eat, so lay off the nuts.
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They say you are what you eat, so lay off the nuts.
Short Jokes
I saw this guy going up a hill with a wheelbarrow full of horseshoes, four leaf clovers and rabbit’s feet. I thought: “He’s pushing his luck!”
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I saw this guy going up a hill with a wheelbarrow full of horseshoes, four leaf clovers and rabbit’s feet. I thought: “He’s pushing his luck!”
Short Jokes
My girlfriend’s such a bad cook, she uses the smoke alarm as a timer.
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My girlfriend’s such a bad cook, she uses the smoke alarm as a timer.
Short Jokes
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
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On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Short Jokes
Next week there will be constant rane, hale, drissle, gails, thundre and litning…really bad spell of wether.
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Next week there will be constant rane, hale, drissle, gails, thundre and litning…really bad spell of wether.
Short Jokes
I visited a postcard factory yesterday. It was good, but nothing to write home about…
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I visited a postcard factory yesterday. It was good, but nothing to write home about…
Social Posts
I can’t get over the fact that the word ‘gullible’ upside down looks like a cat.
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I can’t get over the fact that the word ‘gullible’ upside down looks like a cat.
Short Jokes
I fired myself from cleaning my house. I didn’t like my attitude and I got caught drinking on the job.
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I fired myself from cleaning my house. I didn’t like my attitude and I got caught drinking on the job.
Puns
Why are more people happier on Fridays? Because, the next day is sadder day.
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Why are more people happier on Fridays? Because, the next day is sadder day.
Short Jokes
I broke my finger today, but on the other hand, I’m fine.
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I broke my finger today, but on the other hand, I’m fine.
Short Jokes
I just put up a high voltage electric fence around my house. My neighbor is dead against it.
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I just put up a high voltage electric fence around my house. My neighbor is dead against it.
Short Jokes
To the person who stole my train set…what goes around comes around.
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To the person who stole my train set…what goes around comes around.
Puns
How do trees access the internet? They log in.
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How do trees access the internet? They log in.
Short Jokes
A guy in my neighborhood is in the hospital after he had an accident where he was electrocuted. He’s ok now, and he’s looking forward to being discharged soon.
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A guy in my neighborhood is in the hospital after he had an accident where he was electrocuted. He’s ok now, and he’s looking forward to being discharged soon.
Short Jokes
Teacher: “Which one is closer, Sun or Africa?” Johnny: “Sun” Teacher: “Why?” Johnny: “We can see the sun all the time, but can’t see Africa.”
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Teacher: “Which one is closer, Sun or Africa?” Johnny: “Sun” Teacher: “Why?” Johnny: “We can see the sun all the time, but can’t see Africa.”
Puns
I bought some new frog skin shoes. They’re open-toad.
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I bought some new frog skin shoes. They’re open-toad.
Short Jokes
My water bed is much bouncier now that I’ve filled it with spring water.
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My water bed is much bouncier now that I’ve filled it with spring water.
Short Jokes
Keep the dream alive hit your snooze button.
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Keep the dream alive hit your snooze button.
Short Jokes
I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid but my parents told me the sky was the limit.
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I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid but my parents told me the sky was the limit.
Short Jokes
I used to date the invisible woman. Now, thinking about it, I don’t know what I saw in her.
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I used to date the invisible woman. Now, thinking about it, I don’t know what I saw in her.
Puns
Short Jokes
I’ve invented a game called Silent Tennis. It’s like regular tennis but without the racquet.
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I’ve invented a game called Silent Tennis. It’s like regular tennis but without the racquet.