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Short Jokes
I come from a family of failed magicians – I have 2 half sisters
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I come from a family of failed magicians – I have 2 half sisters
Short Jokes
A Roman guy walks into a bar – holds up two fingers and says “Five beers please!”
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A Roman guy walks into a bar – holds up two fingers and says “Five beers please!”
Short Jokes
I once shot a deer in my pajamas. How it got in my pajamas, I will never know.
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I once shot a deer in my pajamas. How it got in my pajamas, I will never know.
Short Jokes
Man died after being crushed against a mirror. Witnesses said: “he saw it coming”
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Man died after being crushed against a mirror. Witnesses said: “he saw it coming”
Short Jokes
If you want to set up and run a small company – that’s your business.
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If you want to set up and run a small company – that’s your business.
Short Jokes
My boyfriend and I are Cherokee Indians. He stood me up at our favorite restaurant last night, but it’s OK. I don’t think we could have stayed anyway, we didn’t
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My boyfriend and I are Cherokee Indians. He stood me up at our favorite restaurant last night, but it’s OK. I don’t think we could have stayed anyway, we didn’t have a reservation.
Short Jokes
My clients have a 86% survival rate, which makes me an above-average babysitter.
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My clients have a 86% survival rate, which makes me an above-average babysitter.
Short Jokes
I heard a guy at the beach screaming, “HELP! SHARK! HELP!” I just laughed. I knew that Shark wasn’t going to help him.
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I heard a guy at the beach screaming, “HELP! SHARK! HELP!” I just laughed. I knew that Shark wasn’t going to help him.
Short Jokes
Interviewer: Where were you born? Me: Missouri. Interviewer: What state are you in now? Me: Apathy. Interviewer: That’s not what I meant. Me: I don’t care.
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Interviewer: Where were you born? Me: Missouri. Interviewer: What state are you in now? Me: Apathy. Interviewer: That’s not what I meant. Me: I don’t care.
Short Jokes
Why do scuba divers roll backwards out of the boat? Cause if they rolled forwards, they would still be in the boat.
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Why do scuba divers roll backwards out of the boat? Cause if they rolled forwards, they would still be in the boat.
Short Jokes
Interviewer: What’s your worst quality? Person: Honesty. Interviewer: Well, i don’t think that honesty is a bad quality. Person: I don’t care what you think.
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Interviewer: What’s your worst quality? Person: Honesty. Interviewer: Well, i don’t think that honesty is a bad quality. Person: I don’t care what you think.
Short Jokes
Well I was going to donate blood today until – the lady got all personal and started asking, “Who’s blood is this?” and “How did you get it?”
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Well I was going to donate blood today until – the lady got all personal and started asking, “Who’s blood is this?” and “How did you get it?”
Short Jokes
Toilet stolen from police station, cops have nothing to go on.
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Toilet stolen from police station, cops have nothing to go on.
Short Jokes
Communism jokes are not funny unless everyone gets them.
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Communism jokes are not funny unless everyone gets them.
Short Jokes
There are two types of people in life
those who think there are two types of people in life and the rest.
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There are two types of people in life
those who think there are two types of people in life and the rest.
Short Jokes
Why did the Canadian cross the road? Because that’s the direction his car was sliding.
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Why did the Canadian cross the road? Because that’s the direction his car was sliding.
Short Jokes
A blind guy walks into a bar…then a table, then a chair, then another chair…
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A blind guy walks into a bar…then a table, then a chair, then another chair…
Short Jokes
Ever since the news came out about Samsung..their phones have been blowing up.
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Ever since the news came out about Samsung..their phones have been blowing up.
Short Jokes
My friend’s a scientist and accidentally chilled his lab rat to absolute zero. At first the rat was just frozen, but he’s 0K now.
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My friend’s a scientist and accidentally chilled his lab rat to absolute zero. At first the rat was just frozen, but he’s 0K now.
Short Jokes
When I lived on a houseboat I was seeing the girl next door, but eventually we drifted apart.
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When I lived on a houseboat I was seeing the girl next door, but eventually we drifted apart.
Short Jokes
A Spanish magician announced that for his final trick, he would vanish into thin air. He counted down: uno, dos, then POOF! He was gone, without a tres.
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A Spanish magician announced that for his final trick, he would vanish into thin air. He counted down: uno, dos, then POOF! He was gone, without a tres.
Short Jokes
I like my girlfriend’s new glow-in-the-dark braces…her smile really lights up the room now.
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I like my girlfriend’s new glow-in-the-dark braces…her smile really lights up the room now.
Short Jokes
The best thing about adolescent humor…is that it never gets old!
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The best thing about adolescent humor…is that it never gets old!
Short Jokes
Descartes walks into the bar. The bartender asks him, “will you have your usual tonight?” Rene replies “I think not” and he disappears.
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Descartes walks into the bar. The bartender asks him, “will you have your usual tonight?” Rene replies “I think not” and he disappears.